Chukking Phattey!!

Well in the times of television, going to an actual stadium to watch a cricket match definitely makes you wish you had even better than 20-20 vision!

Venue: Visaka Cricket Stadium

Date: 1^st May 2008

Players: Deccan Chargers Vs Kings 11 Punjab.

Dad, lil sis, lil bro and me, little excited family pack huddle out of the car after an hour and a half long drive to the brand new Visaka stadium at Uppal. Well it’s so new they haven’t even finished constructing it yet (there’s a long story behind that too). There were these dancing balloon figures around the stadium that were quite amusing. So far, so good. Got into the entrance queue our ticket was checked. We were frisked (eewh..this is the real effect of terrorism, it’s more like discomfort-ism). Had to take the cello tape off my cell phone so that the security guard could remove the battery and check it’s authenticity. I don’t know what they really check. They confiscated all my 3 mineral water bottle and said I can purchase water inside. Cheapo money minters! Got my snacks coupon and got tagged. Yay!

I’m finally in. They were distributing those Rs. 6 per pack Sunfeast biscuits. I don’t like biscuits but I had no choice. I was forced to exchange my snacks coupon for 3 packs of Sunfeast.

We had bought the Rs 1000 tickets. Although the cheapest tickets in the house we couldn’t afford any more or didn’t think it was worth anymore. There were tickets ranging up to Rs. 5000. I’m shocked. Incidentally I hear the tickets in Mumbai are much cheaper they start at 400 and end at 1000. Why this discrepancy in prices, IPL? Well our seats were 4 flights up. There were no lifts and my dad suffers from arthritis.

So we reach our box. Since the stadium is still under construction the steps are only concrete, no cement. The steps are too narrow, only enough space to place your feet while in the chair. The widest of the steps allowed only 1 person to pass through at a time. The chairs were another story. Poor quality uncomfortable plastic chairs, so tiny and that everybody in the row was overlapping the next person. Good to back strengthening exercise.

While the audience grabbed their seats the cheerleaders took position. We were already thirsty so we converted my borther into a spot boy any made him run for water. He came back with 2 glasses of coke. They refused to sell him a bottle of water claiming that we would chuck it at the players once empty. Goes to show how much they’re expecting from the match. But I would have rather thrown the biscuit packets. Since they are heavier and more use less they would travel farther and hit harder. Finally the match started.

Gilly and Gibbs got out really quick. Very Very Slow Laxman chugged along the longest. Rohit Sharma brought a little hope and we cheered for him. There were no sixers till the wee end. We had to make do with chaukas. Meanwhile we got hungry and thirsty. The cool drinks and water had stopped flowing even before the end of the first inning. You only has the option of slice, which is too sweet and heavy for the occasion. The only option in terms of food were stale Frankies and Bingo.

So we’re hot and thirsty. There is an ominous cloud of dust forming over the stadium. Making the picture all the more gloomy. It tried to switch and cheer for the visitor team. They were equally bad. I found myself phasing out in the middle sometimes, and then telling myself to concentrate of the match.. I paid a hajaar bucks after all!

Oh and the cheer leaders! I feel for them. They have no clue as to what is going on. What is a boundary. How does a guy get out, nothing. They only dance when the music comes on. Every time Kings 11 did some thing there Deler Mendi would be warning you to “panga na le”. So the cheer leaders sitting there in this sultry atmosphere in plastic tights totally bored out of their wits. Ouch!!!

We left by the fifteenth over of the 2^nd inning. Don’t know how we survived that long!

Pitey, bahut bure pitey.